Jokes no one else will understand.

Everyone in Ghana loves a good joke. In fact, I would say that a good sense of humor is one of the most valuable survival skills a person can have in this country. It seems the most awkward moments I have found myself in have been times when a Ghanaian asks me a question or makes a comment and is expecting a nice light-hearted banter, and I respond with well-intentioned earnestness. My first clue that I have missed the culturally appropriate opportunity for a brilliant witticism is the glazed over look that comes into the Ghanaian's eyes... and then it is always too late to backtrack and switch to comedian mode.
So, I have been trying to build up my repertoire of hilarity to keep myself ever-ready for the moments when it becomes necessary to make my neighbors laugh. And if it is more my Yevu (foreign white person) strangeness that they are laughing at rather than my scintillating wit, it is all just as well. As humor is such an important part of my attempts to integrate into the culture of Ghana, I thought I would try to share a few stories with you... Though I realize I am faced with the difficulty that a lot of the humor, being based on things that I now take for granted in Ghanaian culture, may be lost on my mostly American audience. But having grown up in a family that delights in nonsensical humor, I have long been used to telling jokes that no one else will understand.
The most common situation in which I must always keep a good joke on hand is the inevitable "what did you bring me?" question that I always face when returning from anywhere. This is a standard question that is sort of the Ghanaian equivalent of saying "welcome home, did you miss me?" To say "I brought you nothing" would be the equivalent of saying, "you mean nothing to me, why would I miss you?"
But in truth, I can not afford to bring EVERYONE a loaf of bread (the usual offering) each time I go somewhere, so a good joking reply is required. My Ghanaian sister told me a standard response to this question is: "Oh, the bridge in the town where they sell bread fell into the river, so there was no bread to be bought... sorry-o. Next time I will bring you bread."
I found a response that worked well for me. When I first gave it, I got a good round of approving laughs, and when I attempted a much simpler version in my halting Ewe, the laughter was uproarious. My story went somehow like this: "I bought you biscuits, but a roving band of mercenary goats was waiting for me at the junction, and when I came, they attacked me and ate all of the biscuits! So, sorry-o. Next time I will bring you biscuits."
Goats have become the favorite punchline of my jokes. When my 29th birthday was approaching, one of my Ghanaian brothers told me he would buy me a goat to slaughter and cook in honor of me. I replied that as I was turning 29, I expected him to bring me 29 goats - one for each year. So this became an ongoing exchange between us in the days leading up to my birthday. I would ask him how the goat collection was coming along, and he would give me some story as to why it was or wasn't going well. Well, as you can imagine, my birthday came, and, alas, no goats. When I asked my brother why he didn't bring my goats, he told me a story about how he had 25 goats collected, but some disaster happened, and he was not able to get the remaining four goats, so instead of bringing me an insufficient number of goats, he decided to wait until next year. Of course, at this point I informed him that next year required 30 goats; 29 goats would never do for my 30th birthday.
About a month later, his birthday was approaching, and he told me that I should start looking for his 45 goats for his 45th birthday. I let him know that in no way could I provide 45 goats. He would have to be satisfied with 45 fish... which I quickly bargained down to 45 spaghettis (don't ask). His birthday came, and he was nowhere to be seen, so the next day when he came over, I told him "Oh! I had 45 spaghettis prepared for you, but when you did not come, the spaghettis ran away!" He acted shocked, "No! They ran away?! How could they run away, and why did you not chase them??" I replied, "They slithered off like snakes to Nigeria, and I am not chasing them all the way to Nigeria!"
Hmm... Yeah... I guess you had to be there. But I did warn you that you nobody else would understand.
My Ghanaian Mama Margaret is a hoot, and we have several inside jokes between us. I have some jokes that only my fellow volunteers would understand. And some I think only my family would understand, if only they saw or understood the circumstances that make me start laughing out loud like an idiot for no apparent reason. And some jokes are only for myself. They keep me sane when I begin to wonder what on earth I am doing here. Whatever the case, humor will most likely be the survival skill that keeps me going the longest in Ghana, even when I am the only one who laughs.